My 4-step plan for shopping with children

 

Shopping with children can be difficult. 

 

There must be a plan.

 

(Important note: this plan only works if you have lovingly disciplined children.  If you have decided that your kids are in charge then this plan will not work.  Good luck to you and all those around you.)

 

Step One: Caffeinate

It is best if you are at Target where you can immediately access Starbucks.

Who am I kidding?  It is always best to be at Target no matter what.

 

Step Two: Contain

That means anyone age three or under is securely strapped somewhere; the cart or a baby wrap for an itty bitty.  This rule is important even when your three year old is the size of a 5 year old.  What are you people looking at???

 

Step Three: Conquer

Have your list ready to go and make it happen. 

Mess around too long and everyone will lose it (including you).

 

Step Four: Congratulate

Once your children and purchases are safe and secure in the car, look at that gorgeous woman in the mirror and tell her..."Way to go Sister!"